Understand Attachment Patterns for Better Relationships

Have you ever encountered the word “Attachment Patterns” and wondered how it might shape your relationships and where you fit into this complex web of emotions? Samvedna Care, with expert guidance from mental health therapists, would like to highlight this important aspect of relationships. 

Attachment patterns refer to how an individual connects or relates with another individual with whom they bond. In other words, attachment patterns include emotional transactions and different ways of interacting and behaving in relationships. It is interesting to note that one’s attachment style is formed during childhood and is centered around the parents’ interaction with the child. John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth (psychologists) shared that attachment patterns are basically the lasting psychological connectedness between human beings. Every attachment is based on four main pillars namely

• Proximity maintenance– We naturally desire to be close to our loved ones. This is because proximity provides a sense of safety and security. Example: Think of a child clinging to their parent’s leg when scared. 
• Safe haven: We visit our loved ones when scared or upset. Example: It’s like seeking a hug from your partner after a rough day at work to feel better.
• A secure base: Loved ones are a secure base from which we explore the outside world.

Example: You’re more likely to pursue your dreams when you know you have someone who believes in you.

• Separation distress: Feeling anxious when the people we are attached to become distant or absent is a natural reaction, highlighting the depth of our emotional bonds. This distress can be magnified for individuals already struggling with mental health issues. Example: Ever felt anxious when your best friend moved to a different city? That’s separation distress

Based on these criteria, there are four different types of attachment patterns and experts at Samvedna Care highlight each one as follows:

1. Secure Attachment: These individuals feel good about themselves, are comfortable with emotional closeness, and trust their partners. They communicate well and have stable, fulfilling relationships. Securely attached individuals often navigate the complexities of relationships with resilience. 
2. Ambivalent/ Insecure Attachment: People with this style often seek reassurance, worry about their partner’s commitment, and feel anxious in relationships. They may come across as clingy or needy and find it hard to handle breakups. The uncertainty and anxiety in relationships associated with ambivalent attachment can be especially difficult to manage.
3. Avoidant Attachment: This pattern arises when individuals have distant or absent parents during childhood. They tend to keep emotional distance from partners, dismiss their own feelings, and struggle with emotional intimacy.
4. Disorganised Attachment: People with this pattern can desire emotional closeness but also fear it, leading to confusion and instability in their relationships.

To sustain a relationship, it is very important to understand one’s attachment patterns and those of their partner. Interestingly, attachment patterns are not permanent; they can be changed, probably with the help of mental health therapists or professionals. If you are struggling with your relationship or are curious about your attachment patterns in further detail, Samvedna Care offers online/offline counselling to individuals. With our experts on board, be assured of taking a step forward in ensuring your relationship well-being by understanding attachment patterns and working through them with us. We specialize in helping individuals navigate attachment patterns, manage mental illness, and provide online counselling for those seeking professional relationship guidance.